“Hello. It’s okay. I know it’s you.”

I love Steven Moffat.

I love Matt Smith.

I. LOVE. DOCTOR. WHO.

Now, don’t get me wrong, Russell T. Davies did an amazing job of bringing back the Doctor and Christopher Eccleston and David Tennant especially did amazing jobs getting some of us introduced to the series for the first time and others re-introduced to a series they’d loved already. But honestly, the combination of Steven’s fantastic writing and Matt’s creative acting produces something completely new that just pulls you into the episode. I’m not going to give away what happened in the episode, but damn if I’ve ever been this intrigued by a season premiere of any show. I love how Steven just has the show hit the ground running and never stop from there. It’s how the Doctor’s life works, anyway.

I really can’t get over it. Especially the first 15 minutes of the episode. I re-watched the last ten minutes of the first 15 minutes of the episode four times already. It completely blew me away. *cough* I also love how quickly Rory is understanding everything a lot more than he did in the last season. He’s keeping up with River and everything, and I love it. Plus, he’s billed in the opening credits now

It’s funny, in a preview for the next episode, he kinda looks like Dean Winchester with the way he’s dressed. I love it. And I love that my fandoms have collided again. It can go in a circle now:

Aldis Hodge plays Alec Hardison in Leverage (which has mentioned Doctor Who or has had Doctor Who-related terminology on the show). He also played Jake Talley on Supernatural. Caroline Chikezie was in Supernatural as well, playing a character named Tamara in the season 3 season premiere, “The Magnificent Seven.” She also played Lisa in Torchwood, Ianto Jones’ Cyberwoman former thought-to-be-dead girlfriend. John Barrowman plays Captain Jack Harkness in both Torchwood and Doctor Who. Mark A. Sheppard is playing Canton in Doctor Who, but has also played James Sterling in Leverage and the demon Crowley in Supernatural. I LOVE MY FANDOMS!

Still reeling from that episode.

I tip my hat to you, Steven Moffat and Matt Smith, for being so bloody brilliant!

“No, I call a do-over!

Dean: “No, I call a do-over!”
Sam: “What are you, seven?”
- Supernatural

I would love to call a do-over on life in general right now.

I was listening to Lily Allen’s song “22″ and realized I kind of feel that way.

“She’s got an alright job but
It’s not a career
Whenever she thinks about it
It brings her to tears”

I haven’t been brought to tears, yet, but damn if I’m not close. My dad keeps dangling all these amazing job offers at his place of work in front of me and saying how well I’d do in those positions because I am actually smarter than half the people that work them now. When I ask for more information on them though, I get the answer of, “Well, they’re not hiring right now. They actually just laid some people off.”

Oh. Well. That’s useful. Thanks a bunch. I love getting hyped up for something only to be immediately let down. It’s super-awesome.

The job I’m at right now actually did get a pay increase, which is really nice, I friggin’ love it. But we don’t get overtime (which, let me tell you, if we did get over time, I’d be ROLLING in money) and for it to make any difference, I have to work about 70 hours a week just to make it through each month and still have a little bit of cushion for things such as groceries or shoes for work. I love how every day is something different and it’s not your ordinary job, and I like that I’ve done it. It brought me out of my shell and I’ve made a bunch of new friends. But, I don’t want to work there forever. I really really don’t. And I find the longer I stay there, the harder it is to find something else to do.

So, like I said, I would love a do-over…starting at about 22, I think. Seems like a good point judging from the song. I’d stay at home (even though just visiting is a hassle, let alone when I still lived there, but it was cheaper), finish college, work part-time and then go on my merry way in graphic design from there. Maybe even try to move to a new country because I don’t feel like I belong in America sometimes. I feel wrong here.

Sometimes, I kind of hate my life. UGH. I need something to change. Not a disaster kind of change, but one for the good that will get my ass up and out of here.

“The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.”

After being on a week-long The Producers kick, I switched gears and watched Sweet Home Alabama. I still wanted a comedy, but I wanted the romance aspect as well. I’d seen it before, but I just wanted something I knew. But after that, I wanted to watch another romance movie, though I wasn’t sure if I wanted to watch a romantic comedy or one of those dramas, like Romeo + Juliet. Netflix doesn’t have that one on Instant Queue, though. Then I thought about a musical, so I went with another Baz Luhrman film and watched Moulin Rouge! for the first time. Late, I know. Believe me. It’s extra-sad because I had the soundtrack a few days after it was originally released, I just never got a chance to see the film and kind of forgot about it’s existence at all after a bit. It showed up in the Instant Queue, though, so I figured might as well watch it.

**If you haven’t seen the movie and don’t want to be spoiled, READ NO FURTHER**Now, I remembered it had Nicole Kidman, but I did not remember Ewan McGregor being in it. Probably because when the movie came out, I was in the 9th grade and wasn’t really up on that many actors except the obvious ones like Johnny Depp and Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise, etc. Once I saw Ewan McGregor’s face as Toulouse-Lautrec was singing “Nature Boy” (nice job on picking John Leguizamo for that role, as well. He’s super-talented, too) I about fell off my bed. I’ve friggin’ loved this man since at least Star Wars. Men Who Stare At Goats? Loved it! And when he was the Camerlengo in Angels & Demons? Best part of the movie! He’s so friggin’ handsome and just ultimately super-sexy. Anyway…back on track, after I saw Ewan McGregor, I got super-excited (though, not gonna lie, still doesn’t equal ‘instant hit’ with me just because of Ewan – I saw Incendiary…and that was total crap, it was so bad).

I adored the way it started with the Narcoleptic Argentinean falling through the roof and the humor and everything. It was awesome. Then the actual Moulin Rouge Can-

Christian thinking, "WTF?"

Can part came in, and at first, I thought, “What the hell is this mish-mash of random ultra-modern music?” I shrugged it off though because my boo Ewan was in it and Nicole looks friggin’ amazing. Insanely jealous of this woman’s looks, she’s fantastic. Either way, I got even more weirded out when Satine was acting all crazy as Christian was trying to come up with his song and everything. He gave the exact same face I would’ve given her were I him: o.O

After the presentation of the play when Satine started singing “One Day I’ll Fly Away” then Christian broke in with his one line: “How wonderful life is now you’re in the world,” = complete admiration for this man. I’ve watched that same 16 seconds of film over and over just because he sounds so amazing right there.

"El Tango de Roxanne"

Of course, the movie has to take a turn for the dramatic; which I must say they did very well, it’s not easy to transition from the humor at the beginning to the intense drama at the end, but it flowed rather nicely, I must say. Either way, the next part of the movie I watch over and over again now? “El Tango de Roxanne.” Only this movie could make a song like “Roxanne” into something as interesting as it was. Of course, Ewan’s harmonious lines are fantastic and he sang them and played it so well, I was loving every second.

Then when Satine tries to push him away for, unbeknownst to him, his safety and he’s kept out of the theater and punched and he just lies there in the rain on the road – completely heartwrenching. You can’t help but feel terrible for the guy. You also have to love that he has friends that took care of him and got him back home, even if he did lash out at Toulouse. I was rather shocked at how he handled everything, by pawning his typewriter for some money and then using said money to, though it came about accidentally, publicly say during the show he was “[paying] his whore,” was an intensely painful emotional moment for Satine, I’m sure (not to mention what her illness was probably doing to her at the moment as well). The fact that she got her ass up though and sang “Come What May” to him and then he turned around and beautifully sang it in return and then the whole “Coup d’Etat” that ended the show: everyone was raving and clapping and Christian looked like he was in complete bliss.

Bliss won’t last, of course, in this tragedy as right at that moment, Satine is overtaken by the consumption, aka: Tuberculosis, which she didn’t know about until the day before…which is more warning than Christian had (though, honestly, with how many times he’d seen her pass out and then that night she was sick and some of the ways she acted, especially right after she sang the lyrics “and forgive everything” and had to take a legit breather, he really should’ve seen it coming, but anyway). I have never seen a death scene look so legit in my LIFE. Ewan McGregor played that so ridiculously well, I honestly don’t understand how he didn’t win an award for that. I

Heartbreaking.

almost NEVER cry at movies. EVER. My friends get annoyed with it, actually, because they think I’m heartless. I’ve cried every single time I’ve watched that death scene. Ewan plays it so well, you feel like you’re in his place at the moment and it’s the most believable cry I’ve ever heard in a movie. I really can’t praise the scene enough. It’s absolutely fantastic. If there were an Oscar for Best Scene in a Movie (which there really should be), this scene would’ve/should’ve won HANDS. DOWN. Even just hearing the music from the end of the movie from when Christian sings, “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return,” and the end credits music, I’m weeping like a baby. It’s heartbreaking. Absolutely heartbreaking.

So, because I’m me and I can’t just like anything, I have to obsess over it, I’ve listened to nothing but the soundtracks for the past three days and have watched the movie once each of those three days as well, rewinding and re-watching my favorite scenes a number of times before letting the movie continue. The beginning makes SO much more sense after having watched it once already (mish-mash of songs-wise). I’m probably going to annoy myself with the movie a bunch…but then I’ll hear Ewan’s amazing singing voice again, and I’ll fall right back into it. Mmm.

I need to go get it on Blu-Ray so I don’t have to keep watching it on Netflix…

I still can’t believe it didn’t win more awards than it did. RIDICULOUS.

On a side note: It’s also ridiculous How to Train Your Dragon didn’t win any awards because of damn Toy Story 3. Don’t get me wrong, I loved both movies, but Jesus, Disney, we get it. You make good movies. You made a third sequel of a movie that won awards, give someone else a chance, please. Thanks. How to Train Your Dragon was so awesome…ugh. ROBBED, I tell you.

“Out of the night when the full moon is bright comes a horseman known as ZORRO!”

For my birthday, I got the Disney Treasures DVD set of the first season of Zorro starring Guy Williams. Next to Doctor Who, Zorro is my favorite TV series ever. Guy Williams was brilliant as Don Diego de la Vega/Zorro. He was super-handsome and super-talented. He pulled of a Spaniard very well for an Italian. It’s too bad his role was stopped on Bonanza because he would’ve been a stand-out act in it. I can’t believe he wasn’t in more stuff, but hey, he was the dad on Lost In Space, so that’s cool.

Cracked.com even agrees and thankfully noticed as well that Batman is a giant rip-off of Zorro. Zorro is the original “Caped Crusader” whether Batman fans like it or not, and they have Tyrone Power and Guy Williams to thank for it. And the creator, Johnston McCulley, of course.

I used to watch Zorro on Vault Disney on the Disney Channel when it was still on. Sure, it came on at about 2:00AM, but damn if it wasn’t worth it. Plus, I wasn’t doing anything else over the summer when I was 14 and 15, so why not watch the series? I was REALLY angry when they said they were stopping Vault Disney, though, because it was my favorite part of the Disney Channel (as well as So Weird) and I thought it was whack that they were replacing it with extra re-runs of crap that was re-running throughout the day already, anyway. Why not continue Vault Disney so everyone could see the legit shows Disney used to make? But oh well. I’d seen EVERY episode of Zorro thanks to Vault Disney. But, the second to last episode had a cliffhanger and I was crazy anxious for the next and final night of Vault Disney on September 9, 2002. Aaaaaannnnnnnd I fell asleep. I woke up at 3:15AM. You can’t even imagine how pissed I was about that. I’d known for weeks that September 9th was going to show the final episode of Zorro and I’d FALLEN. ASLEEP. I’ve still yet to see that final episode. Since 2002, I would randomly sit down at my computer sometimes and think about that final episode of Zorro that I’d missed and if I’d ever be able to see it. I looked it up on Amazon one day and found the DVDs…as well as finding out they were super-expensive at $78.00 for the Treasures version. I didn’t want the colorized version (I may later, but not now) because the black and white version lets the show keep it’s old-school feel, and I’d rather keep it that way.

I still don’t understand why Vault Disney was taken off the Disney Channel. Especially when now all there is to watch is friggin’ Hannah Montana, Shake It Up and Jonas. Seriously? That’s the best we can do? We went from a legit version of the Mickey Mouse Club and Zorro to So Weird and That’s So Raven to Hannah Montana? Really? I mean, at least So Weird was creative and interesting AND it had the Fonz helping it out! Then That’s So Raven had Raven, Anneliese and Orlando, who are probably the only legit teenage actors to come out of any Disney network since the 1960s. I mean, can I just say: LINDSAY. LOHAN. Sure, Shia Lebeouf made it out okay. Yeah, he’s in the Transformers movies…which are crap, but at least he’s legit and has been in some really awesome stuff and has shown that he can be a real actor.

But…I really don’t understand why we can’t have shows like Zorro anymore. I’m not saying re-make the show, GOD, don’t. They already screwed it up by new movies and somewhat modernizing them with Banderas and Zeta-Jones, and I can’t stand those movies. I want the legend of awesomeness as Zorro to stay with Guy Williams. But can we get an original idea instead of all the crazy B.S. that’s coming out now?

It honestly worries me that kids nowadays don’t have a Zorro-type show. Or a Bill Nye the Science Guy. Or Beakman’s World. Or even Inspector Gadget! AND, they don’t have anything like Are You Afraid of the Dark? I really think these are the types of shows kids should have. Really, what does Hannah Montana or Jonas teach them other than, “If you’re not famous, you’re not gonna be able to do much with your life unless you hide yourself?” Wizards of Waverly Place? “No magic, damn, sucks for you!” At least Zorro taught that corruption is wrong (not that it’s really stopped, but it showed there are legit people out there who want it stopped and that really, you can do something about it if you’re willing). Bill Nye and Beakman taught science in a fun way. Inspector Gadget taught inventiveness and some morals. And Are You Afraid of the Dark? taught kids to be afraid of shit and to not be so intense about some things. Kids nowadays have lame-ass crap that doesn’t really teach them anything. Although, god forbid, Hannah Montana or Emily Osment or Selena Gomez comes to town, your parents are gonna go APESHIT to get a ticket and have no problem fighting other parents to get you a seat there…and isn’t that really want we want to teach our kids, anyway? Fight until you get the best seat in the house?

God, I swear I was born in the wrong decade…

The Loss of Creativity in Writing is Long Past, I Fear…

You know what I would love?

For people to STOP writing books like Twilight. Furthermore, if they do write a book shadowing Twilight in all major aspects, don’t try to hide it by removing it from your summary. It’s like when you see a preview for a movie and it looks friggin’ awesome and then you see the movie and it SUCKS.

If you’re reading A Discovery of Witches and don’t want to be spoiled or are enjoying it immensely, read no further.

Now, this book I’m reading didn’t start off like Twilight. The girl was raised by lesbian aunts after her parents were murdered when she was seven. Okay. But then it mentioned vampires. I got worried, but held out hope because the protagonist in this story was not a sappy pushover and could stand up for herself and you could tell she didn’t need a man to make her feel useful. Later, I realized the story took place in England where the weather is basically the same as it is in Forks…I became rather disappointed. Then:
Deuteragonist: “She smells too good, I must get away before I kill her!”
Me: “Oh God, no. Stop. Please. This is too much.”
Protagonist: “How old are you?”
Deuteragonist: “VERY.”
Me: “Well…at least he was born around the time of Clovis instead of the Spanish flu…”

Okay, so I try to recover and realize that it’s not really like Twilight. Except for the part where there’s a lot of similarities and instead of werewolves, there are “daemons.” All-righty then. She becomes overly infatuated with the deuteragonist. More goes on and you can just tell that they’re one of those cliché couples who are “destined to be with each other” in some way. I still smell the faint whiff of Twilight. After a threat made towards the protagonist, they decide to flee to the deuteragonist’s place in France. Then he leaves, to protect her (but not in that asshole Edward way, this guy’s reason is actually legit, but still) and she cries enough to where she almost drowns herself. Seriously. She’s a witch, she can manipulate that stuff without meaning to. Me: *HEADDESK*

Then he comes back and after knowing each other for three weeks they each say they love each other which apparently automatically means they’re married in the vampire world. Yeah. Vampires, what’re you gonna do with ‘em? So, then they think they’re gonna be all happy. Sure. There’s still 80% left of book, that’s not happening. Anyway, the deuteragonist tells protagonist to stay inside the walls of his castle (yeah, he was a stonemason when he wasn’t a vampire and continued that for a bit when he became one and built this friggin’ castle…aka: château, whatever). Does she listen? NO. Just like Bella’s told to stop looking for trouble to attract Edward, this woman goes outside the château walls and immediately gets kidnapped by a Swedish witch. Yeah. So, instead of the Volturi, there’s this thing called the Congregation that decided, around the Crusades era, vampires, daemons and witches aren’t allowed to interbreed or even really interact without severe consequences, hence the kidnapping of the protagonist. Plus the fact that she’s apparently super-powerful and every other witch is super-jealous. Me: *HEADDESK*HEADDESK*

Then, yay, protagonist with help of a children’s story her dead ghostly parents recite to her, she learns how to use her powers even more and kind of saves herself after being crazy tortured. Deuteragonist is super-frightened for his new wife’s life that they flee back to her home in Madison, NY. But while in France, protagonist was taught by deuteragonist’s equally vampire maid how to make a certain tea that she needed to drink every day. Once with the protagonist’s lesbian witch aunts, they realize the tea is a contraception. The deuteragonist doesn’t believe it’s necessary because vampires can’t procreate the same. Me: “YOU CAN’T BE SERIOUS!”

Oh, but all of this might start a war. Which is where I am now. What to do about this war they accidentally but don’t really care that they started? I still have a couple of chapters to go, but I’m sure it will take me a while to finish them because after almost every piece of dialogue, I yell, “Oh my god, SHUT. UP!” because it just gets crazier and crazier. AND WHY, in all of these stories, do the women have to be such idiotic bitches? If I knew the protagonist personally, I’d punch her in the damn face every day, overprotective vampire husband or not. She seriously needs to calm the hell down. She’s not “stubborn,” she’s controlling and she needs to stop because all of her controlling doesn’t seem to have done a damn thing to help her. She’s at the point where she should’ve learned to back off 15 chapters ago.

And it’s sad. When I went to get the book, it was on the Bestseller Shelf, so I got high hopes. My hope was dashed once the realization came upon me about the type of book I was reading. It was double-dashed when I remembered Snooki is also a bestselling author. I will lose all willingness to even read when I see people wearing shirts saying, “Team Matthew” or “Who needs a Cullen when I can get a de Clermont?”

I do feel I have lost complete hope in humanity as a species to ever actually be literate and creative from this point onward, though. Gone are the days of admiring Dickens, Austen, Lewis, Tolkein and Rowling. Actual creativity and good writing are no longer factoring into publication. It has now fallen to idiotic biographies and the molestation of the English language to sell books.

“I do not pretend to know where many ignorant men are sure.”

Thank you, Clarence Darrow.

I am researching information for a fantasy book I want to write. Even though I’m agnostic, it’s a book dealing with angels and demons and evil creatures and the age old battle between good and evil. Fun, fun. At least it’s not gonna be yet another Twilight. I’m just saying.

Anyway, the research for this book is beyond aggravating. No Christian story is the same. For each sub-religion in Christianity, there’s a slight tweak on each story. I mean, not everyone can even decide on the same damn Bible. There are how many different versions?

I was raised Catholic. Both sides of my family are raging Catholics. My mom went to a Catholic school from KG – 5th grade or 8th grade, wherever their high school started here. My grandma…don’t even get me started. She’s like a walking/talking Catholic billboard. She loves the religion. She’s the treasurer for her local church. She cries when she recites any story from the Bible. She answers the phone not with a “Hello” and not with a “Heaven-o” like that one lunatic, no, she answers it thusly: “Praise be Jesus and Mary.” Yup. I understand you love ‘em, grandma, I do, but just say “Hello”; and if you don’t like the “Hell” part of “Hello” then honestly, get over it.
Anyway, my dad’s side has my aunt, and that’s enough. She won’t send her daughter to the public school where she lives because the test scores for them are so low, which was apparently God’s way of telling her to keep her daughter in Catholic school. No, that’s society’s way of telling you you moved to the wrong neighborhood.
My brother and I are about the same on this subject, though, funnily enough. We went to our little sister’s First Communion last year and the entire time, we were just joking back and forth because neither one of us had been to church in years. As the collection plate came around, he leaned over and said, “Ever notice how the church just seems to be a giant Child Support collector for God?” That had me laughing in silent hysterics as I thought over how plausible that actually sounded. Later on, the priest congratulated all of the First Catechists and everything and the entire clergy clapped, the parents the loudest, of course. Then he said how he was going away for a week to celebrate his 10th anniversary of being a priest by helping out his hometown in Mexico. This was followed by silence. Again, my brother and I lean to talk to each other and he says, “Ten years seems like a milestone, why is no one clapping?” I said, “Because it has nothing to do with their children. Duh.” He laughed and said, “These selfish assholes!” Again, we started laughing. His fiancée, on the other hand, is a pretty devout Catholic as well, so she wasn’t as happy with our whisperings. It’s okay, though. She’s legit. I love her. She can be devout all she wants, she doesn’t push it on me, I’m happy.

Again, though, the biggest thing is no one’s story ever matches up! Sure, there are parts that do, but entire stories are never the same. When is the Sabbath? Saturday or Sunday? Is Lucifer’s name actually Lucifer? Or is it Beelzebub? Or Azazel? Or Iblis? MAKE A DECISION.
I’m trying to find out the names of the 20 Grigori Leaders of the 200 Fallen Angels from The Book of Enoch, and none of that is actually the same! One has 30 Grigori Leaders. What? Most say that Samyaza as the first, but after that, it’s just whomever you wanna put in whichever spot, as long as Azazel and Amoras are in the top five and Turiel and Shamsiel are near the bottom.
Even more annoying is every single archangel and fallen angel has about 50 different ways of spelling their name. Again, pick a damn spelling and stick with it! How are Chazaqiel and Ezêkêêl anywhere CLOSE to the same? They’re not, but they’re apparently the same guy. Then, there’s Azazel again. Another name for him is apparently Ramêêl, which is pronounced the same as Ramiel, BUT, Ramêêl and Ramiel are two completely different people, because Ramêêl is actually Azazel.

WHAT?!

So, this is why I hate Christianity and I think it’s all crap. None of their stories ever match, but I’m supposed to take everything it says to heart.

No thanks.

I’ve researched it. Wicca makes more sense. You can practice however you want, but certain things stay the same all over the place. Instead of looking to Wicca to maybe learn how to make more sense, Christianity just wanted to smash it to bits…by using all of the same holidays to take them over for themselves.  No, they just basically stayed a pagan religion and screwed it up royally.

“Ministry of Art…and Artiness.”

I’ve always loved Vincent Van Gogh’s paintings. He used such bright colors and the dot-like technique just makes it that much more interesting.

I looked up more information on ‘Starry Night Over the Rhône’ and found how he described the painting to his brother Theo.

“Included a small sketch of a 30 square canvas – in short the starry sky painted by night, actually under a gas jet. The sky is aquamarine, the water is royal blue, the ground is mauve. The town is blue and purple. The gas is yellow and the reflections are russet gold descending down to green-bronze. On the aquamarine field of sky the Great Bear is a sparkling green and pink, whose discreet paleness contrasts with the brutal gold of the gas. Two colorful figurines of lovers in the foreground.“

Maybe it’s just me, but I think that is the most interesting way a painting has ever been described. I know it’s just kind of saying what the colors are, but the fact is he saw these colors before and then decided to use them the way he did to make a really beautiful scene.

I’m not going to lie, like I said before, I’ve always loved Vincent Van Gogh’s paintings, but my interest was renewed with that episode of Doctor Who, ‘Vincent and the Doctor’. Not only did the actor actually look quite a lot like the real Van Gogh, but they set everything up to look like the paintings and Murray Gold’s compositions really set the scenes into place. I love the soundtrack for this episode, let alone the entire series.

Anyway, right now, this painting is my computer’s wallpaper, as that’s the only way I’m really going to be able to see it. ‘Starry Night’ is the wallpaper on my iPod Touch and has been for a while. I’ve decided I’m going to go through a couple of Van Gogh’s paintings as my computer’s wallpaper for a while. After running through them, I’m moving to Claude Monet, who painted the same type of scenes.